Username | My favorite Weeds quote:
"It's the MILF weed!!!"
| Said by: Snoop Dogg
| Said to: Nancy Botwin, Conrad, and Snoop's Crew
| | Weeds Season 2 Episode: "MILF Money" (2.08) |
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Username | My favorite Weeds quote:
"Alright, listen closely. I'm not going to beat around the bush. Ha ha ha, your little body's changing. It's all good, believe me. Problem now is, every time we jerk the 'gherkin', we got a lot of unwanted sticky white stuff everywhere, right? Right. So...first order of business: No more socks! They're expensive, gumming up the works plumbing-wise. Now you might be thinking to yourself, 'But, Uncle Andy, What do I do with all that 'pearl jam' if I can't spew it into Mr. Sock?' Glad you asked...You can have a lovely time tugging the tiger in the shower each morning, that eliminates the need for a goo glove. But the day is long [and] masturbation's fun, so unless we want to take four or five showers every day, we're gonna need some other options. So, let's start with the basics: tissues. Perfectly acceptable backstop for all that creamy Italian. They can be rough and dry on such soft, sensitive skin and it can stick to your d*ck head like a f*ckin' band-aid--Ouch. From there we move on to more lubricated flack-catchers--specifically, bananas. Step one: Peel the banana. Step two: Slip the peel over your 'randy johnson' and start pitching. Now, for extra credit, warm up the peel in the microwave. Not too hot! Serious 'yowza'. Also, olive oil, moisturizer, honey, spit, butter, hair conditioner, and Vaseline can all be used for lube. In my opinion, the best lube is: lube. So save your allowance and invest in some soon.
Alright, moving on. When you tug your 'thomas' on the toilet.... shoot right into the bowl. In bed [wear a] soft t-shirt, perhaps a downy hand towel of your very own that you don't mind tossing after tossing. There's no such thing as polishing the raised scepter of love too much. It reduces stress, it enhances immune function. Also, practice makes perfect, so work on your control now, while you're a solo artist. You'll be playing some long, happy duets in the future. Okay, class dismissed."
| Said by: (Uncle) Andy Botwin
| Said to: Shane Botwin
| | Weeds Season 2 Episode: "Last Tengo In Agrestic" (2.03) |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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Username | | My favorite Weeds quote: | | Said by: | Said to: | | Weeds Season 2 Episode: |
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